The Emperor's System
36 Prank?
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The Emperor's System
Author :Lazyfatmonk
© Wuxiaworld

36 Prank?

Everybody stood there stupified, brother, are you serious? Do you think we can't differentiate between a person and a swine beast?!

"Boy, you better speak properly, this isn't the time for jokes! Who are you?!!" One of the mercenaries that looked like their leader stepped up and questioned Nick.

Nick couldn't use the disguise skill to change himself to a swine beast due to the lack of time, but this didn't mean he couldn't change his looks a little, and what the mercenaries and guards were staring at right now bared no resemblance to Nick at all.

So, having no fear of exposure, and realizing that all the people in front of him were either at the Profound realm or at the Spirit realm, Nick became very relaxed.

"Hi there, I came here because I saw someone that owed me money!! But guess what that ungrateful asshole did, he actually took a shit in my hands, so I smacked him in hopes that he would show a little more sincerity, but who knew he would try to fly away!"

The people were now at a loss for words, brother can't you at least make your story a little bit believable, first of all, who would believe that a swine beast owed you money?

Secondly, what do you mean it flew away, of course, it would fly away after being smacked away.

At this time the middle-aged man in the leading carriage stepped of his carriage fuming and headed towards the caravan to see who had the guts to throw his own swine beasts at him.

You see, he was the merchant that owned the caravan and the swine beasts were exotic creatures he bought from a faraway city, and not only were each one valuable, but they were also very hard to find.

Now one of his precious babies was actually completely disfigured then thrown into his carriage in a position that forced him to kiss the beast. But if he had to be honest with himself, he kind of enjoyed it...

Nick saw a plump middle-aged man heading over his way, carrying the vile beast that ravaged his hands.

The man arrived in front of Nick that was currently surrounded by armed guards and said.

"Were you the one that attacked my beast?!"Asked the merchant.

"Yes! Are you the owner of the beast?!"

"Yes! Look at it now, it is on its last breath, who would buy an already dead swine beast?! You have to compensate me for this beast and the damages to my carriage!"

"It serves it right, who told your beast to refuse to pay back its debt and instead shit on the hands of the loan shark instead?!! You have to compensate me for the damages to my hands and pay back the debt that the swine beast owed!"

"What?!! Don't you have any shame, damn you sure are shameless, claiming that a stupid swine beast owes you money, and besides who would be stupid enough to put their hands in front of a swine beast, everyone knows that these beasts enjoy shiting in people's hands the most!"

"How dare you call me shameless, hmph your the one whose shameless claiming that a swine beast is valuable, By that shameless mouth of yours I wouldn't be surprised if you never find a wife?!!"

"Oh yeah, I already have a wife, how do you like that?!!"

"Hmph...even if you have a wife I'm pretty sure she is uglier than these swine beasts here!"

" know my wife?"The middle-aged man was puzzled.

Guards, "..."

Nick, "..."

Brother Merchant, are you admitting that your wife looks uglier than a swine beast, and brother Oink, isn't it a little bit harsh to reveal people's secrets in public especially if you knew his wife?

However, they didn't know that the one most shocked, would be Nick himself, brother, weren't we having fun throwing insults around, look, you've made it awkward for me now!

And the Merchant also seemed to have understood his mistake as he blushed slightly from shame, damn this was so embarrassing, he actually admitted he married someone whose looks were inferior to those of an ugly swine beast's, if his wife heard about this she wouldn't give him an allowance anymore!

He didn't know his wife's past, and all he knew was that it was mysterious, but his wife had one feature that made one look past her looks, and that was her money!

She was loaded, every time he asked here for his monthly allowance she would step out and come back with bags of profound stones, and ask him if it was enough!

And even though she wasn't pretty, she did take good care of him as she cooked, cleaned, and loved him unconditionally, but alas he was a man who traveled after all, and every time he saw those gorgeous heavenly beauties that were in the arms of other merchants working with him, he became more and more jealous.

Of course, he didn't bother to think about the fact that the reason he had the luxury to travel and look at the heavenly beauties was all thanks to his lovely and supportive wife.

Nick also noticed that the man seemed to be embarrassed and in a bind when he saw the middle-aged man blushing, so he cleared his throat and laughed.

"Hahaha, you sure are funny boss, pulling a prank in broad daylight, genius, absolutely genius boss!" As Nick talked he hugged the middle-aged man and threw him a sly wink.

The middle-aged quickly understood what Nick was up to and played along swiftly while feeling rather grateful to Nick.

"Hahaha, Yes we got them, we really fooled them didn't we, hehe!"

Hearing the conversation between the two weirdos the guards and the mercenaries grew increasingly annoyed, were they saying that all this was a lousy prank, do they think that everyone else was stupid besides them.

"Wow, boss, who knew that you would pull a prank so ingenious then reward all those that participate with five profound stones each, so generous!"

As soon as they heard that they would be getting a five profound stone each for, literally standing there and watching a show, the guards and mercenaries grew excited and started praising the middle-aged merchant vehemently.

"Wow, brother merchant sure is a genius, coming up with such an amazing prank!"

"I know what you mean, any normal person would scare us or humiliate us as a form of prank, but not brother merchant, he humiliated, hurt and scared himself for this prank, who else has this kind of commitment?!"

"I agree, did you see how the swine broke through his carriage, and he didn't even blink in kissing it, to make the prank more realistic."

The merchant could only stand there with a wry smile and accept their sincere 'praises'. Not willing to stay here long he quickly rewarded all the guards and mercenaries that participated in the 'prank', as for the money he didn't mind it since all he had to do was go back and ask his wife for a raise.

As he sent off the guards and mercenaries he turned his head and found Nick with a 'cute' smile waiting for him with his hands out, the meaning was clear, I also participated, please pay up!

Seeing that most of the mercenaries were still close he couldn't curse at Nick and could only obediently pay him.

"Thank you, boss, listen as for your ugly lady troubles, let us meet at the golden inn and talk tomorrow, I think I have some advice that might help a man in your current situation, for now, goodbye!"

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