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The Emperor's System
Author :Lazyfatmonk
© Wuxiaworld

79 Guess

Filled with anxiousness Nick rushed over to the Emperor's quarters, intending to retrieve little Dean from the crazy gangster Empress before he suffers from anymore emotional and physical trauma.

Arriving in front of the room Nick first pressed his ear to the door, hoping to hear the sweet sound of little Dean being 'Educated'!

"So little pervert, are you still going to keep on sticking to your dream, the dream of marrying a hundred women?!!" From the voice and way the person spoke one could immediately understand that it was the gangster Empress speaking.

"Y...Yes, even though you have whipped me, scolded me, and even threatened to castrate me, I do not plan on giving up on my grand dream because of these pointless threats!" Dean, who seemed to be determined to stake his life on the line said.

Nick almost burst into tears hearing this. What was wrong with this idiot? Didn't he know that he could just pretend to learn a lesson then choose to ignore it later when he was far away from the crazy lady?!

If the gangster Empress had actually been that crazy and had she actually castrated him how was he even going to accomplish his dream?! Everyone knows that even though women might not place grave importance on the size, they at least except the thing to exist between a man's legs!!

"Damn it!! Why are you so stubborn?!! Listen here little brat, how can you call your self a man when your dream is so small?!! You should at least aim to conquer all the women in this world, and making sure that you hoard all the women so that no other man gets to experience what it's like to have one!!" The crazy Empress roared out.

"No, I only need a hundred women! Listen, one woman has enough needs, imagine how tiresome it's going to be on me with a hundred women, as for all women in the world, wouldn't they just suck me dry?!!" Dean also equally determined roared out.

"What kind of needs do you mean brat?!!" The crazy gangster Empress was honestly curious, did this boy know things that were beyond his age?

"Clothes, food, hugs, and....and...and...k...kisses!!!"Dean said furiously as his cheeks blushed rapidly.

"That's it? But you said that they would suck you dry, what did you mean by that?" The Empress feeling that that way Dean phrased everything was just too naughty was unwilling to let go so easily.

"Of course, I mean k...kissing!! Imagine if each woman kissed me on the...m...mouth once, with every woman taking away one spit, a hundred women would run me dry, as for anymore..." Dean who seemed utterly vexed with his dream said.


Nick, unable to let this conversation go any further rudely barged in!

"Thank you for teaching him so well for me! I will return the favor soon Empress!" Nick said this because although he was furious at the Empress leading little Dean astray, he took solace in the fact that he would soon have to poison every Empress including this one with laxatives!

"Brother, you came!! Wuuuuuu..." Dean abruptly burst into tears as soon as he saw Nick.

"Ohh, your here, great! I've taught him well for you! But, the meal you sent was just too, small and delicious!!! Go and make this Empress some more, then maybe you might get lucky later on hehe!" The crazy Empress said as she gave darted Nick a naughty wink, but it wasn't the slightest bit enticing since she was picking her nose as he did it!

"No thanks! I only start work tomorrow, guess you can only wait until a month from now! Also, can you stop picking your nose?!" Nick said calmly while the shivering Dean hid behind him.

"Huh?! Big pervert, do you actually think that I'm stupid?! I've already asked one of the guards and learned that you have already begun working, meaning that you now serve me, the Empress!"

"Also, who the fuck do you think you are telling me not to pick my nose?!! Even the Emperor fell in love with me upon seeing the unique, cute, and graceful way I picked my nose!!" The gangster Empress didn't plan on removing her finger from her nose as she spoke, in fact, she even began digging more vigorously, as if she was mining for gold in there!!

Nick had to hand it to the Emperor, he sure was...umm...unique, even the women he married seemed to be completely different and quirky!

"Sorry, but I'm the head chef and my position in the Emperor's heart is no less than yours!! And if you keep on trying to force me, then he will have to choose, if he would rather have me in the palace or you!!" Nick said all this in a feminine and sassy voice.

"..." Dean slowly moved back from Nick.

"..." The crazy gangster Empress sensed a threat.

"Cough, cough! You don't believe me?!! Then wait and see! Let see if which one of us will be in the palace tomorrow, you, or me!!!" Nick roared before storming out with Dean in tow and slamming the door shut.

Nick firmly believed that the only way to get out of a losing conversation was to utterly devastate the opponent with stupifying remarks! Besides he wasn't lying, the palace had thirty Empresses, but only one head chef! And come tomorrow he would be here, but the crazy gangster Empress wouldn't!

"Big bro Nick, what was that just a moment ago?" Dean who was lagging a few meters behind Nick solemnly asked, swearing that if Nick used the same feminine and hair raising voice from earlier that he would rather run back and take his chances with the crazy Empress.

"Oh that, its called the stun tactic! Whenever you are in a losing conversation, and your opponent has the facts on their side, you stun the opponent with unimaginable actions or words to buy time until you can beat them!" Nick didn't mind imparting some valuable life knowledge to Dean.

"Ahh, that makes sense! That talkative gross lady just wouldn't stop talking, but once big brother spoke like a creepy naked ghost she quietly listened and let us leave!!"Dean seemed to have learned something valuable seeing how he was recording it all in his notebook.

Nick didn't particularly enjoy how Dean phrased his voice, what did he mean a creepy naked ghost?! He definitely didn't sound creepy!!

This was a lesson Nick had learned back on earth. One time, he was in the courtroom swaying the jury and the judge, but then some new evidence was brought in by the opposing lawyer that almost destroyed his case!

The evidence wouldn't have been problematic if Nick had a few days to dissect and study it but it came so abruptly that it left Nick in jeopardy of losing the case!

So, unable to think of a solution and on the verge of breaking his no-loss streak, Nick boldly stood up and accused the opposing lawyer of having sexual relations with the victim causing an uproar all around and forcing the judge to announce a continuation!

It was in this time window, that Nick analyzed and broke down the credibility of the evidence making it inadmissible in court! And when asked what he meant with his earlier claim he apologized to everyone including the opposing lawyer for his rash claim that was fed to him by his client, and his newly proven innocent client was happy to back him up!

"Head chef! Your presence is requested by the Emperor!!" Luke, and one other guard that Nick hadn't seen before rushed up and called him over.

"Okay then, Dean go back to the residence and reflect on your mistakes! Also, tell your sister to stop hatching schemes with the two fatties or she will lose her weekly chocolate rations!" Nick chased away Dean before following the guards to the main hall.

After arriving in front of the main hall both guards stopped by the door and gestured Nick to enter. Nodding slightly at the two guards Nick strutted in with his hands behind his back, trying his best to display the dignity and grace a head chef should.

"Hmm...Do you know why you are here?!" The Emperor, who was so polite and cordial to him just yesterday now painted a completely different picture as he sat on the throne and looked down on him fiercely!

"Because you called me?" Nick asked truly confused.

"Cough, cough! I mean, do you know the reason why I called you?!!" The Emperor was finding it exceedingly difficult to remain calm.

"How the hell would I know?! Did you perhaps tell those guards to tell me and they forgot?!! Fuck them, wait here, I'll go and give them a good beating!!" Nick walking in a huff back to the door to find the two guards.

"No!!! I m...mean...can you guess what you did?!!" The Emperor seemed to have aged years in these few seconds he spoke to Nick!

"Oh, a guessing game?!! I swear I was always good at those!! Umm...is it perhaps because I am too great a chef and you wanted to praise me?!!" Nick was genuinely excited.

"Nooooo sigh...can you please cooperate? I mean guess what you did wrong?!!" The Emperor's face grew pale as he began shaking involuntarily.

But no matter how hard Nick thought he couldn't think of anything, he had been a model citizen and cultivator ever since he came to this world! Even after coming to the imperial city, he has done nothing but good!

He first helped by giving poor people a way to enter the city for free, gifted an anxious driver a bottle of wine, fed a hungry captain, charitably accepted the head chef position, defended the Emperor from some fucked who aimed to discredit him and even treated the Emperor's wives like they were his own!

But something bad, Nick couldn't even think of one!

"Can you give me a hint?" Nick asked the Emperor, finding this guessing game a little difficult.

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